From depressed to corny in 15 easy steps

I have been just a little depressed since I wrote the post about friendship. Multiple times I have gone back on my thoughts while remembering everything that some South Africans have done for us, and then remembered everything some South Africans have done to us, and become even more depressed. However, what has come out of these vacillating thoughts has been the realization, that yes, I am thankful for what you have done for us and how you have helped us, but it still doesn't take away the hurt you caused by discussing something very private to us with probably whoever would listen and making me cry over a book club meeting. But, I am letting it go. I really am.

These are the things that have helped me pull out of my funk:
(I will be doing my bullet points like this :: in honor of the cheek-licking julochka)

:: Writing a new blog with the hilarious VEG , my siamese sister in brain.

:: Watching corn grow. I kid you not. Thanks julochka for making me aware of the Iowa Corn Cam.

:: Iasa of Blissfully Unaware Lounge Singer starting Hermit Book Club.

:: Bonus cookies going from vanilla to macadamia.

:: Leaving for Europe in a week.

:: Zambia.

:: Accidentally tipping the waitress 67%.

:: All of your lovely and supportive comments.

:: The little girl, in relation to whom I'll always think of myself as Auntie Green even though she has no idea who I am, turning three.

:: A garden, that I'll be visiting in August, coming along.

:: Having sworn on this blog without hearing my mother's voice yelling at me, or without having received a single email from her about said swearing. My dad did however email telling me that he goes to bed at 10:30PM, not 10PM

:: Having a nice round number of followers (Yup. I'm pretending like the two who jumped ship didn't cause me endless heartache. Should not have bashed the bible... Says who? God?)

:: The possibility of locating some parachute pants in my closet and actually wearing them to blog camp and thus freaking julochka out.

:: The possibility of someone recognizing me in Copenhagen while I tour it with the blog camp chicks who will all be wearing their identical blog camp T-shirts (which you should order too, all the cool kids have..., and this is in case they ever believe that my credit card is in fact mine and send me the fokken thing).

:: The hubby going out and having a ring designed and made just for me to cheer me up, and "to be written a praise post about, in which I [hubby] should be called the best husband on earth." I will have to write the post once I can attach a picture of the said ring (Zambia internets...grumble....). The man really knows his way around my corrupted soul.

Okay, I realize that for you to understand all of the above, you would have to read all of the blogs that I contribute to slavishly and including the comments as well as most of the blogs I follow and their comments, and maybe some twitter, and my private thoughts. But hey, that IS the fun part.

Now, run along and go read!

Honest? Me?

I Don't quite know what to say, but I'll for sure say something.

Thank you to Marathoner81 who by some odd twist of credibility seems to think that I am honest. Wow. Such pressure.

This is an award and a comes with these rules:

1. List 10 honest things about yourself, and

2. Pass it on to 7 cool people who embody the spirit of the Honest Scrap

Here are my amazingly honest 10 things about myself. And you all know how I hate to write about myself, hey?

1. I don't actually have a crazy eye. I have two, and they are eerily closely placed. I also have an evil eye I give to people who either don't flush, or who don't wash their hands after going to the toilet. Soap is preferable. Sometimes I also give the evil eye to people kicking the back of my seat on an airplane, or people leaning their seats back on an airplane for the entire duration of the flight. In fact I just give the evil eye to having to travel by plane in coach, while teleportation would be far nicer, or first class.

2. High fives make me rather uncomfortable. Especially if I am the one expected to high five. 

3. I don't enjoy the sauna. There. I said it. It's off my shoulders. How glorious it is to finally be out of the closet (or the sauna?). Once a year I try it out in the vain hope of understanding what sweating (not a big fan of this either) in a dark room is all about, and never do. I hope my citizenship is not revoked for this. I only have the one.

4. I'm a complete literature snob and judge people by what they read, and then try to not let it show. I often get to drinking and fail miserably. But hey, I'm still friends with people who I have drunkenly accused of reading 'beach', 'airplane' and 'white trash'. It's my diplomatic ways that have made me popular.

5. I'm a complete tequila snob and judge people by how and what they drink in the way of tequila. In Mexico this was okay, since everyone else was just as diplomatic about this, but this has won me no friends is South Africa. Again 'white trash' might have come up.

6. If it wasn't for the internet there would be many, many people who I love and who supposedly at least like me, who would never hear from me again. It's not the lack of love, it's pure laziness. 

7. I will gladly go live anywhere in the world, except for one of those dry countries. I recently heard a story from an acquaintance of ours about him having resorted to making his own wine in Saudi Arabia, and that nearly brought tears to my eyes. Is there possibly a legalization-movement that I can join, or is that just for marijuana?  

8. I have seen so many giraffes in the past eight months, that I'm kind of over them now. Elephants still rock though. 

9. I can forgo candy for years, but I get Big Mac-withdrawal symptoms within a week. The same goes for a Starbucks latte. I heard there is a Starbucks at Copenhagen airport, and it is just a tad obscene how much I'm looking forward to that meeting. Starbucks also figures under my 'alternate accommodation' when I'm going to visit my friend in Albuquerque in August. 

10. The only exam that I ever tried to cheat on was in religion class. It was on the Ten Commandments. I just couldn't remember them by heart. What does that say about me as a person?

Whew. Done. Being honest is tough. Especially since I know my mom will read this, and I already have quite a few 'where did I go wrong with raising you'-talks coming, just from this blog. To her I will always be 16, and out to get her.

I would like to give this award on to:

Julochka at moments of perfect clarity

Dawn at From Congo 

Molly at ohfortheloveofblog

Betty at Betty Noire

SD at Stepford Dreams

And that's it. Today 5 is my interpretation of 7. 

I need coffee.