Thursday, September 17, 2009

Aks me or I be blue

Regardless of the sun, and the impending summer, and the long-awaited rains looming in the horizon, and my fast-approaching 200th post, I'm feeling a little blue today.

Is this one feeling Blue or purple?

I'm just not feeling today. You know.

So what now, why you blue Everyday Extranjera? You don't even like the color. Not since your mother made you wear it for 18 years in a row, because "it looks good with your skin tone and the blond hair." Ah, that hair, who would have thought that getting away from underneath those mandatory bangs would be such a relief.... But why you blue girl?

Is it the Viking? Did he do something? Come on, you can tell me...

NO! He did nothing wrong. Although I managed to yell at him for putting on too much cologne this morning. And now he's gone to work thinking he smells like he poured a medium-size bottle of musk (Is this liquid? I don't know.) mixed with some old-man-trawling-Cancun-for-a-dance-partner on himself.

It might have been the navy-blue polo he was wearing. Like a red flag to an angry bull. Dunno.

So what? Is it the fact that your jeans for a 'curvy figure' are a little on the tight side around the waist moving you from voluptuous curviness to fat territory more strongly than ever?

Come on Curious Extranjera, you know I don't care about that.

True, they hurt my back where I was abused by the physiotherapist yesterday, but other than that I can still breathe. And that is a silver lining If I ever came across one.

Huh. Well, I guess whatever floats your boat girl. Go for it. But do tell me, if it isn't the blue-jeans cutting off your circulation, what's wrong then?

Well, I guess it's mostly nothing. Small things here, small things there, only decaf left in the house... You know how it goes.

What? Did I do something grocery-related to make you sad?

No, I forgave you for eating those strawberries. Allergies schmallergies. I'll get over the swelling and the rash around my mouth soon enough.

Oh, yeah. Sor-rey. Didn't mean to eat so many. They were just so good. My apologies!

But If you're taking even something that makes your lips impersonate Angelina Jolie's on crack in your stride, what could it be that's making you so blue. You seem to be dealing?

See, even now I'm going to pretend that the 'on crack' part isn't there at all and just run with 'Angelina Jolie's'. So yeah, I'm dealing. Just feeling blue.

Oh, I know now! It's the fact that the third season of Weeds has been sold out in the entire greater Johannesburg area. Right? And that you had to watch the first season of True Blood instead? And find out that vampires hold absolutely no fascination for you anymore. 

Yeah there was that. Don't forget how much that whole vampire-sex-feeding-weirdness creeps me out. Yuck!


Okay, so if I'm not going to get a straight answer from you, let's try this a little differently:

Everyday Extranjera?

Yes, Curious Extranjera?

What would make you happy today?

Well, many things. World peace, Weeds third season magically appearing on my desk, end to famine, honesty, a really nice steak, getting a really nice haircut without having to get my hair cut, end to pettiness... You know, the usual.

But most of all it would make my day if you all asked me more interesting questions for my 200th post. Right here in the comments or by emailing me at

That would totally be the icing on the cake, and possibly even the bubbles in the champagne.

The cream on the top is already reserved for the cool peeps who asked me some questions yesterday. Thanks guys! And thanks for the congrats y'all!

You are making me happy! And not at all blue.


omchelsea said...

After attending a private girls' school where the uniform was - you guessed it - navy - I'm allergic to the color. Makes me feel depressed and snarky.
But jeans? You can always buy more jeans. They don't even have to be blue anymore! Here: buy some red jeans. Or pink. Everyone like pink, even those of us that hate it. Because you can totally wear it with skulls and crossbones and make it a fuckyou, I'm pink so DEAL ALREADY. And then you'll never have to be blue again.

Middle Aged Woman Blogging said...

Blue isn't all bad. The sky is blue, the ocean is blue and my eyes are blue!! I have decided I need to stay positive in this crazy world we live in.... and be thankful! It's the only way I can get through the day!

Gretchen said...

I love your writing! The pictures and posts are great! Very unique!

Optimistic Pessimist said...

First of all I have to disagree with you on True Blood. I heart True Blood. And Eric makes me tingle everytime I see him. Maybe I'm still in my vamp phase.

Anyway...I'm definitely going to ask a question I'm just taking my time because I want it to be a good one.

Angelina said...

Feeling blue, can't be true.

But if it is true, then you must put on some funky music and dance, dance, dance. And if you are really, really blue, you must sing at the top of your lungs as you dance, make sure it is has a quick beat and move to it until you are exhausted. eg: James Brown "I feel good"

Are you still blue? Have some chocolate cake!

Not So Glamorous Housewife said...

Dear Extranjera,
If you had to choose between never eating meat again or never drinking wine again which would you choose and why?

If you were an animal what would you be?

What was your favorite crochet project of all time?

How do I make my children leave me alone for a couple of minutes while I type this?

Thank you.
Not So Glamorous Housewife

Leenie said...

Okay, I lurk on your blog and read it at work--like now--with fear that my suppressed laughter will cause spewage or seepage of bodily fluids. But I am curious about the nic "Extrajenra" (spanish for exhotic foreigner?) And how did you come by this fine name?

iasa said...

ok, so which musical celeb would would you have a fantasy about in which 10 foot red licorice whips play a prominent role?

how much distance is one allowed to go in order to circumvent the police before one is just being silly?

Ducky Loves Minnie said...

Which fear drives your thoughts and actions the most?

If this is too serious or personal then what were you doing when you had the most fun in your life?

Optimistic Pessimist said...

ok I have two:

How do you know you really exist?

If there were a war between leprechauns and aliens, who would win?

Ph.D. Mommy said...

Your favorite word?

DeepBlu said...

We all get those blue days. How does it feel to go with morning coffee?