Monday, June 29, 2009

NOT Pollyanna

What's wrong dear?

Well, a lot of positivity went down the drain yesterday and up came some bugs. Not fictional bugs either. Real, awful, silvery things that scatter when I turn on the light in the bathroom. Harmless says Google, but disgusting nonetheless. And they seem to be feeding on the positivity so that there's almost none left.

Bugs you say? I thought you were in Finland and all was peachy keen and clean?

Yeah. Well. It is. For the most part. I guess I just forgot that all places have an underbelly and that only thing that will make you forget about that reality are the people. And if there's a glitch on that front you end up disregarding the good things pretty quick.

You're being very cryptic? Don't tell me. Have you been working on your novel again? That always makes you all weird in the head.

Wow, thanks. Didn't think I was being "all weird in the head," but now I know better. Thanks for the positive affirmation, dude.

Aww, don't be like that sweetums. You know what I mean. You get all weird and cryptic-like and find it hard to concentrate on such mundane things like taking a shower and switching off things. No fires this time around I assume? Eyebrows in place?

Ha ha. Really. So funny. You got it. Why don't you just go and perform somewhere while I concentrate on doing something worthwhile like really finishing something I've started. I don't need your platitudes right now. Thanks.

I'm sorry dear. I didn't mean it like that. You're nice and pretty and all... So really? You're gonna start writing again?

Well, I was really hung over tired on the train coming back from Helsinki and felt just a tad too unfocused to be reading Foucault's Pendulum, which is just da (literary reference) bomb and requires some actual brainpower and then sorta suddenly as I was watching the houses of Hämeenlinna come into view my hand just reached into my bag and pulled out my notebook and a pen, which was designed by NASA, and writes upside down, and is the coolest shit ever. Got it from a friend for my 30th. Wanna see?

Sure honey!

It's all rainbow-y like, and so fokken cool. I don't think you've seen my Moleskine notebooks either. They are a ple - a - sure to take notes in and I feel like a real writer when I crack open one. And they don't have any coffee stains yet. Aren't they all smooth and writer-y?

You do know that you can't just make up words for your novel. Especially by just adding one letter to make an adjective out of a noun. Perhaps you're just being a tad lazy, pumpkin?

Thanks again, dude! I was the one being all negative and down, and I thought you were gonna try to pep me up some and be supportive and shit, and you just put me down. What's that all about, dawg? And it doesn't even sound like you want to hear about my novel. You just quiz me about my pen and notebook. Way to be encouraging! As if it's all about the props...

Hrahm? ...So tell me about this novel, shug.

Well, you know how I realized that I didn't really like any of the characters and that I thought they were just all a bit too sad and unhappy?


So I made some notes trying to find out what happens and who actually pulls through and is like the one that the reader will identify with and I'm like way closer to finding out who that is and can actually write something that peeps will wanna read. isn't that cool? Now I just need to think and be all in my own little cocoon and lay off the Blogger and make this shit happen! Whatcha think?

That's really nice dear. But won't your followers on Blogger feel like you might just be neglecting them a little bit. They did decide to follow you and many of them comment a lot, which I know for a fact you survive complete days on, so you can't just stop blogging all together.

I never said I was stopping, dude?!?! I just said I need to focus on some other shit too and make this thing happen, and fokken finish something without having to race a deadline. I really should be able to at least find out what happens to the peeps in my novel. Right?

Of course, my darling. Just, stop by here every once in a while and tell us stories of your travels. Wont you? Now go pour some boiling water down the drain to exterminate the bugs, and then tell me more about these characters of yours...?


B said...

Well, dear, I give you a week! :)
Seriously, it's great that you are thinking about your novel and ready to write! But do stop around here from time to time!
Signed, Peep B!

stepforddreams said...

Is that the pen that the cranky old guy who lived int he same condo complex as Jerry's dad "gave" Jerry in that episode of Seinfeld when Elaine hurts her back?

Cyndy said...

Don't you just love the Pollyanna dude/dudette? She always finds her way into my psyche (I have had several similar conversations). My kids don't like her because she often comes with life lessons, all Mary Poppins like.

I am glad she has visited you in regards to your book. I've been very curious. I wondered if blogging helps since you interact with so many bleeps. Without having read a single word of your project, all I can suggest (if I may) is that you just let the characters talk. Forget about descriptions. They will come out in the dialogue just as many of your blogging characters do.

I will miss your posts, but I know that it will be for the greater good. I will then get to say that I know someone who is published (and you will have to change your blogspot name). See, Pollyana speaks to me, too!

wv: stfilif: Trying to say "stiff upper lip" while trying to keep a stiff upper lip. Example: She knew that she would be missing her bleep dearly, but she said, "I will keepif a stfilif while I papiently waitif. Itsa gonna be hardaba, but I canna do ip." Then she started blubbering and sobbing uncontrollably...

Polly said...

Oh, inter-human relations can be hard... and Pollyanna can be annoyingly positive.

I'm really looking forward to that novel but don't stop blogging! We all survive for days on your posts!

M.J. said...

As much as we, your adoring blog fans, love reading your posts, we can't fault you for taking sometime out to work on another project. Do what you need to do--we'll be here when you return. :)

spudballoo said...'re not, wibble, GOING are you? Wibble wibble....

The Fragrant Muse said...

Did you not read the fine print of the blogcamp contract? Once you've been to blog camp you can NEVER stop blogging. Not even after death.

The blogcamp blend might help keep the critters away as they usually hate that stuff. Or was it are attracted by the stuff? Give it a try and if they come back with friends we'll know it's the latter.

Vancouver's Enviro Girl said...

ICK! Bugs! ICK! Now I am never coming to Funland. But seriously, I love it when you have convos with all your personalities. It's awesome. And I totally have space-pen envy.

rxBambi said...

I want to be a character in your book. I want to be a smart pharmacist that everyone loves and always has wine and shoes and handbags. And I want to live. Don't make me die. That would suck.

I bet youre back by July 6th.

what do I win?

RWP are so forean to me, I just don't get them

jane said...

ok- after one post i´m addicted... so take all the time you want- i have a feeling your book will be brilliant...:) besos-jane

Optimistic Pessimist said...

My first time back in a while and now you're thinking of laying off blogger? Hmmm...I am already in a very fragile state. this could possibly push me over the edge. I have nothing better to do than harass/stalk people once i get moved back in with my parents.

The Fragrant Muse said...



Cyndy said...

This just came across the wire! Wow!

Figures it happened when you decided to go offline for awhile : ) PMPL--just for you!


Cyndy said...

P.S. See? Pollyanna WAS there for you!

My name is Erin. said...

Why is it that just when you are thinking of taking a small blogging hiatus, Blog of Note comes along and makes the hiatus that much more difficult to actually do.

precious said...

you're very funny!!!

Erica said...

Hi, just found your blog and it's really entertaining! I'm an American girl living in London, and I can definitely understand the ups and downs!

Extranjera said...

B - You lose. BoN wins. And novel will probably end in the trash can.

SD - Dunno. But I really want to know now. I'm googling it now.

Cyndy - As you might guess book on hold, but I do appreciate your advice. there isn't that much dialogue so far, but I've actually started to go more that way...

Polly - No chance of me stopping now.

M.J. - Thanks. maybe one day..?

Spud - Nope. I'm here. Don't cry.

TFMuse - That after death one will be the totally killer one too.

VEG - They're gone now. Rest assured. I Doomed them.

Bambi - I'll think about it. Once you read it though, I don't know if you want to be in it, though... But I promise you handbags!

Jane - Thanks. and welcome, although doesn't look like there'll be a book now.

Opie - I'm here for you to stalk. I'm cool like that.

TFMuse - Ja. I see that now. ;o)

Cyndy - You said it. Pollyanna strikes again.

Erin - What hiatus? Was I going on a hiatus? All I can remember is BoN. There was no life before it... ;o)

precious - Thanks. I had hoped I came across like that. And not evil.

Erica - Welcome. Yup. Ups and downs, but far less than when I'm on the same continent with my family.