Sunday, May 10, 2009

Snapshots of Zambia vol.2

Q: When do you know you've been in a developing country for too long?

A: When you can imitate a distorted TV show to perfection.
or

A: When you keep watching a program with interest even though you are unsure as to whether you are watching a gardening show or lesbian porn.
or

A: When you feel lucky that you have see-through toilet paper, and that you are able to flush the toilet regardless of the death sounds emerging from the plumbing upon this action.
or

A: When you see a woman on horseback wearing a white wedding dress and a tiara in the middle of a roundabout across the road from the supreme court and your only thought is "Awww, I wish I'd had a tiara at my wedding".
or

A: When you consider it only normal that while queuing at the grocery store the person in front of you will load their groceries on the conveyor belt and leave the shopping cart with the items they couldn't afford after all for you to deal with.
or

A: When you consider it the appropriate action for the person in the grocery store, whom you told that the milk placed on its side in their shopping basket is leaking on their shoes, to simply place it upright to avoid further leakage.
or

A: When you see nothing wrong with a nail salon being called "The Most Best Salon in Lusaka", or that the salon is a concrete block the size of a closet.
or

A: When you think that a waitress feeding her pet crocodile is not that interesting a sight.
or

A: When you instead of avoiding salad calmly take medication every 6 months to rid yourself of worms.
or

A: When you think you can never again be happy in Europe. 

Edit: And most importantly when you are okay with the fact that it takes you 4 hours to post what you've written. 

16 comments:

dutchbaby said...

This is a very convincing list!

I remember, and don't miss at all, the worms on Java.

I also remember seeing a bride and groom on a Vespa going around a round-about in Rome. Her veil was wafting beautifully behind her as they sped off at high velocity.

Vancouver's Enviro Girl said...

That. was. awesome. I can only say that if I had ever had the opportunity to be in a developing country, I would be just as you have been. Except for the worms thing.

iasa said...

Oh and putting off your midday swim in the river because the Clorax factory upstream has exploded bleach into the river again.

Molly said...

TAB ~ That's Africa Baby!
Gotta love it.
Especially the Most Best Nail Salon. It probably is too ...

Extranjera said...

dutchbaby - this bride's veil was less wafting and more snagging on the bushes, but she was still on the horse when I lost sight of her.

VEG - But the worms are the icing on the cake. They make you feel like you really belong.

iasa - or bilharzia.

Molly - Might have to get my nails done just to see whether anyone besides me can fit into the salon...

Mrs.Rotty said...

I've never been to africa, but now i feel like i've been there. lol.

Seaside Girl said...

Just brilliant. Made my evening.

B said...

Oh, yeah, I used to regularly eat ceviche (raw fish, do they have it in Mexico?) in South America, it was worth the worns... almost! I wish we had a The Most Best Salon in Oxford.

marathoner81 said...

Oh...I want to get my nails done at The Most Best Nail Salon. At least it would kill the time while you're waiting for your post to go through.

Extranjera said...

Mrs. Rotty - Welcome to my world. I love it here!

Seaside girl - Thanks. Sometimes it's good to realize how far one has slipped...

B - Love ceviche and Africa is definitely not the first corner of the world where I've taken pills for worms.

Marathoner - Good idea! Will have to think about that while I waist for this comment to upload.

corticoWhat said...

If I didn't know better, I'd think you were actually in East L.A. :)

remember moments said...

OMG-that list is hilarious. Back when I worked @ the Mexican border (Mexico side) I started a similar list....potholes bigger than your vehicle etc.

M.J. said...

After seven months in Latin America, I had a really hard time coming home to the US. I looked at everyone and everything I knew differently. To this day, I dream about going back...

Extranjera said...

corticoWhat - Then if i ever move to America again, that'll have to be my hood. Can't ever leave this behind.

remember moments - have a whole another list (yet eerily similar) for Mexico (one of my great loves on this earth) and will have to give you the one on potholes, but raise you with a tasty taco al pastor ;o)

M.J. - That's gotta be a successful trip! I don't think i can ever again make a home for myself in Europe...

My name is Erin. said...

Visiting Africa is a dream of mine. Ever since I was a little girl I'd wanted to visit, but after reading The Poisonwood Bible, I HAVE TO VISIT AFRICA!!!

I will make sure that the Most Best Salon in Lusaka is on the itinerary.

The part about wishing you had worn a tiara at your wedding made me laugh and laugh and laugh... out loud even.

Extranjera said...

Erin - This here continent is definitely something to see and experience. It is my favorite continent, but you really need a lifetime even to scratch the surface...

I still wish I had worn a tiara, instead of an unfortunate Marilyn Monroe/ early Madonna hair-do, that fell apart when someone threw rice into it. Tiara would have totally reflected that attack.