Tuesday, August 04, 2009


Are my appliances perhaps trying to kill me?

I think so. Or at least they are making very grandiose scenes of their demise. Perhaps to get my attention? Have I not been spending enough time with them? Have I not been the attentive owner, they so sorely need? Are they guilt-tripping me?

There has got to be something.

Yesterday, as I sat around minding my own blog business, luckily 4 meters from it, my washing machine caught on fire.

No, I am not kidding.

Flames and smoke people. Real, actual flames and smoke.

Good that both I and the Hubs are so great in any crisis that we were able to scream like maniacs and attempt to repeatedly open the sucker while it was still on and completely ignore the fact that the first thing you are supposed to do is yank out the fokken power chord, until the flames died down on their own calmly turn off the power, put out the fire, and see what was the matter.

Now I must admit, and as all of you who follow me on Twitter know, the washing machine has been screaming every once in a while. I even suspected it of having made a suicide pact with the fridge who has been on its deathbed for months now, but I did not expect this. As the fridge sighs on, the washing machine is a charred shadow of itself. To be honest, the fridge quietly slipping off to the great beyond of household appliances I can fathom. After all, the house keeps upstaging it at every turn. But the washing machine is the one machine that I give attention to. I push it's buttons and I open and close its lid. I put in detergent, and I empty its filter. I use it correctly, and to its full potential.

Then why?

Is it me? Am I the angel of death? Appliance fires are, after all, nothing new to me.

Extranjera - HAADES or Household Appliance Angel of Death Extraordinaire and Swift.

Yeah. I like it for the letterhead.

 Is this where I go for my paycheck then?


Darcy said...

hmmm...your appliance DOES sound miffed about something! however, it really overreacted when it blew up on you like that ;-)!

i thought my oven was on fire the other day, so I called my husband frantic-like, while opening and closing it...he laughs and reassures me "it's the Pilot light sweetie it's SUPPOSED to be on fire."

Not So Glamorous Housewife said...

We set our dryer on fire in a basement last year on accident. It actually went out before we knew anything had gone wrong. Whew. Now, I'm back from vacation early and working on getting the skunk smell out of our dog. Stupid stupid dog.

LordLynxx said...

Omg.. I'd advise investing in a smoke alarm system. In case something decides self-combustion and you're sleeping/away/etc.

House appliances... They're mystical things, and they're way too complex for me. If something has less buttons than 100 or cannot be connected to the computer then it's way too complicated for me to handle. In this case I ask Google for help and hope it won't blow up on me.

M.J. said...

Greeaaat....I was already paranoid about accidently burning my house down...now I can add my washing machine to the list of things to worry about.

Polly said...

home appliances don't usually combust so yes, there is definitely something going on here. if I were you I would be careful, leave the house and run

have you seen Christine, that film based on Stephen King's novel?

kristine said...

i laughed at the idea of your washing machine and fridge in a suicide pact. Ha! I had a spontaneous fire break out in my old house, due to faulty wiring. That was scary. It was why I moved. Fire is not fun.

Judearoo said...

Thats too weird - just had this conversation with my bf's Mam last week who told me not to put on the dishwasher or washing machine and then leave the house as they have a tendency to go on fire! I pshawed (if one can indeed 'pshaw') and tutted at the apparent lack of fire and water sense in the statement - its rock paper scissors again, fire would be put out my water etc. Reading this it would appear that the ole girl is wiser than I gave her credit for... hmmm.

Vancouver's Enviro Girl said...

See, I KNEW they were out to get you. But flames and smoke is a rather dramatic way to do it. I love the title. That letterhead is going to get a rather impressive weighty look to it :)

Bonnie said...

A little scary... My washing machine has been screaming for several months now too. My hubby has tried to "fix" it by jamming cardboard in between the control panel and the top of the unit. Hmmm, just adding fuel to the soon-to-be fire, I wonder? Damn. I guess we need to go shopping. grrrr...

Thanks for the heads up!

monica said...

That was scary.Your HUBS and you took care of the matter in a mature manner :P
Suicide pact thing was the funniest part.Again i would like to mention the fact that your perspective of looking at the ordinariest of the day to day happenings amazes me.That's why i keep coming back!

Confessions of a DVR Addict said...

You totally need a SHARE THIS button at the end of every blog post.. that way I can share it with my friends on FACEBOOK.. they'll LOVE you.. you always manage to make me laugh with your posts.. and I'm sure they will too.

glorv1 said...

Good thing it wasn't worse. I like the way you look at things with "an open mind.":D By the way, how do you cross out sentences. I've yet to figure it out. Nice blog. Have a great day.

Cham said...

I think the dryer at my old apartment complex hated me. For one, it always had other peoples' clothes in it for hours at a time. Just holding them. That stupid dryer thought my clothes were too inferior to my neighbor's, and therefore, never emptied itself until I was exasperated enough to move them myself.

Also, it shocked me several times. I think there was an ungrounded wire or something. I just know that dryer did it on purpose.

histreasure said...

hahahaha..sorry..this is a serious issue, u know it being a fire, not to mention a conspiracy between household appliances.. so why was i laughing so much reading thru the post?
the letter head's awesome btw, and shall serve as sufficient notice to all parties

Optimistic Pessimist said...

do you think the iPhone was made snide remarks to the washing machine, causing it to commit suicide? i do. no doubt why the battery life was so short.

spudballoo said...

Hmmm clearly there is some kind of secret society going on here. Suggest removal of all electrical appliances and get back to nature? Apart from internet of course, which is a basic human need...

Kyrie said...

I'm terrible with anything in my hands. xD I'm butter fingers.

Extranjera said...

Darcy - It's being replaces asap. I hope the new one gives me the proper respect, or at least no flames.

Robin - No dogs in washing machines seems to be the appropriate thing to say here?

LL - That is a good idea - A smoke alarm (and I'm not kidding here, totally didn't have one. Damn!)

M.J. - Yup it can still burn, even though it's filled with water. Apparently the water is nowhere near the motor?

Polly - Are you suggesting my car's in on the conspiracy???? Oh no. But I've been so good to it!

Kristine - Yup. What is not coming through this story is how really scary it was. But, I'm over it now. The machine stands there unplugged, waiting to be replaced. Serves it right.

Judearoo - She is right. Quoting the insurance/warranty guy: "The water is only in the drum, and nowhere near the motor." (This machine was a side loader, which means that water is not even on top of motor...)

VEG - I even feel like a HAADES now.

Bonnie - be careful, the screaming in our case meant that the drum had broken loose, and was chafing against the outer tub, which created a lot of heat and ultimately set something on fire.

Monica - The conspiracy might be more widespread than I had previously believed....

DVR addict - I'll look into that. Not really good with technical things like that. But, for you, I'll try!

glorv1 - Thanks! You have to set blogger in draft as your default blogger. You can do that towards the bottom middle of your dashboard page. Makes writing and adding pics much easier.

Cham - My washing machine never emptied itself either, nor do the clothes hang themselves up. Thank Zeus the house cleans itself and the blog writes itself, otherwise I would be in it deep. And very stressed.

histreasure - I think HAADES is just almost too cool! Thanks!

Spuddie - But my coffee machine would never betray me. It's my 'go to' appliance.

Kyrie - Me too, but this one was totally removed from any actions on my part. I swear! ;o)