Tuesday, July 21, 2009

Bewitched, bothered, and bewildered, not to mention bitchy

Dude! What happened to you?

What? What do you mean?

You look like shit. Your hair looks like someone tried to glue it back on but then you went to sleep before the glue was dry, and the pillow stuck too. And then you tried to pull it off, but didn't quite succeed, and that's what that weird bald spot is about.

I just... It's just wax. And some gel. And some hair spray. What's wrong with that?

Just being honest. Nothing wrong with being honest, is there? And what's with the deathly pallor?

Oh. I... Too much sun is bad for you, right? Also, I'm pretty tanned now.

Going goth, looks like to me. Well, you're gonna want to dye that bald spot black and find some lipstick somewhere. You do have make up, don't you? I mean that pallor can not be natural. Or maybe it's the  shirt that just drains the color right out of your face. Haven't seen a lime green like that since those creepy DIY aerobics videos from the early nineties.

But... I thought this color was back in fashion now? Kinda?

Yeah. Like the scrunchie, slalom-skiing, wearing your high-cut swimsuit on top of a pair of leggings, and NKOTB are back in fashion, which by the way would match that shirt and the bald spot to a T. All you need now is to open your mouth, display those teeth and you're set.

And it'll be like the year 2000 never, ever happened.

And so it's out of my system. 

Good riddance.


Dealz said...

Great Blog. Just stopped by and showing love. :) Check out my blog. I have worked so hard on it so just trying to get it out there and most people would find it VERY useful. Good Luck. Keep good work up. :)

monica said...

As always...amazing post.
Your posts have this 'curiosity' factor. Its hard to guess what's coming next.Sustaining a reader's interest is a tough job and you are very much capable.That's what brings in numerous followers back every day :)

PS: Thanks, for stopping by my blog and being a follower :P
I was overwhelmed to have you as a follower.

julochka said...

actually, i hate to say it, but all that stuff IS back, including NKOTB.

and methinks you maybe need to venture out of the house today...

but maybe not to golf.

and oh, by the way, will you please, pretty please come by my blog. i mean, yours is great, but mine...whoa. you gotta see it...


WV: fanist: i'm totally your biggest fanist, even if you are pale and wearing neon green...

Laila Of Course! said...

Ahahahaha, I LOVED this post. Wonderful, wonderful. I hate it when it's just "one of those days".. UGH.
Please be sure and pop by my blog and comment! I'm having a bit of a go at a photo caption contest-- enter! I think you have something to say!


An Open Heart said...

I love a good snort with my morning giggle....what? No coffee to go with your hair issues? Maybe some coffee would help....

Heliotrollop said...

Good heavens, I love your blog. And I can totally relate to the "But ... I'm tan!" reaction to being told you look pale. Even when you're telling yourself.

Judearoo said...

:) You're following me! And Im following you... hope one of us knows where we're going cos Im not good with maps.

Hug from Dublin, my gooey-haired friend.

Not So Glamorous Housewife said...

I was soooo jealous when my sister got her NKOTB roadie jacket......but then when they made the "come back" the jealousy faded.

_shambhavi_ said...
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_shambhavi_ said...
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caroldiane said...

oh, I missed you - 4 days focused on RWP (even one having a baby) was long enough! I especially loved "Expat Existence"! You make me giggle!
(I think you must make up the word for word verification - it looks like something you would make up - "anpinge"?!)

kristina said...

oh, NKOTB... the good old days... don't forget the leg warmers and the stone-washed tapered jeans ;-)

wv phitr - to look down on something. usage: I phitr twitter (as if... ;-) )

Meisha said...

Hmm.. Interesting.

But everything ends up coming back one way or another. Even things that should have DIED with the past.

Unfortunate. B

Extranjera said...

Dealz - Thanks.

Monica - Thanks. I am curious, aren't I? ;o)

julochka - Nooooooooooooooooooooooo (on the scrunchie)

Laila - Thanks. Yup. One of THEM days when you just have to kick yourself, because if you don't you're gonna kick someone else. And then there might be a lawsuit. And you might lose, because, after all, it was you who kicked, without any apparent reason, other than you were having one of them days.

An open heart - Coffee is implied. Always.

Heliotrollop - I have no idea what you're talking about. I AM tan.

Judearoo - Goo's gone, but map remains confusing.

NSGH - I kinda still want one. Is that bad?

Shambavi - Yah. Well. Hmm. Okay. Huh?

caroldiane - congrats on the whole grandma thing once more and welcome back. I don't anpinge you for taking part in your grandson's birth-happening palooza.

Kristina - Yah. overlooked the leg warmers, but was consciously blocking out stone wash. So, thanks.

Meisha - I hear ya. And now I'm thinking about stone wash, which so should have DIED. Yup.

eva ravenstein said...

your hair made me laugh out loud, and i've had a pretty awful evening, so thank you!

Extranjera said...

Eva - Thanks! Glad to have made someone laugh and sorry about your evening.